A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again

• Cal

  2021-06-21
  I fully grant that mysterious invisible room-cleaning is in a way great, every true slob’s fantasy, somebody materializing and deslobbing your room and then dematerializing—like having a mom without the guilt. But there is also, I think, a creeping guilt here, a deep accretive uneasiness, a discomfort that presents—at least in my own case—as a weird kind of pampering-paranoia.
• Cal

  2021-06-18
  At any rate, for this particular 7NC consumer, Conroy’s ad-as-essay ends up having a truthfulness about it that I’m quite sure is unintentional. As my week on the Nadir wore on, I began to see this essaymercial as a perfect ironic reflection of the mass-market-Cruise experience itself. The essay is polished, powerful, impressive, clearly the best that money can buy. It presents itself as for my benefit. It manages my experiences and my interpretation of those experiences and takes care of them in advance for me. It seems to care about me. But it doesn’t, not really, because first and foremost it wants something from me. So does the Cruise itself. The pretty setting and glittering ship and dashing staff and sedulous servants and solicitous fun-managers all want something from me, and it’s n...
• Cal

  2021-06-18
  . A vacation is a respite from unpleasantness, and since consciousness of death and decay are unpleasant, it may seem weird that Americans’ ultimate fantasy vacation involves being plunked down in an enormous primordial engine of death and decay. But on a 7NC Luxury Cruise, we are skillfully enabled in the construction of various fantasies of triumph over just this death and decay.
• Cal

  2021-06-18
  I don’t think it’s an accident that 7NC Luxury Cruises appeal mostly to older people. I don’t mean decrepitly old, but I mean like age-50+ people, for whom their own mortality is something more than an abstraction. Most of the exposed bodies to be seen all over the daytime Nadir were in various stages of disintegration. And the ocean itself (which I found to be salty as hell, like sore-throat-soothing-gargle-grade salty, its spray so corrosive that one temple-hinge of my glasses is probably going to have to be replaced) turns out to be basically one enormous engine of decay. Seawater corrodes vessels with amazing speed—rusts them, exfoliates paint, strips varnish, dulls shine, coats ships’ hulls with barnacles and kelp-clumps and a vague ubiquitous nautical snot that seems like death incar...
• Orange

  2018-12-25
  面向大眾市場的豪華遊中包含著一些令人無法承受的悲傷感。就如同大多數無法承受的悲傷感一樣，這種感覺令人難以捉摸。它的起因非常複雜，但結果卻異常簡單：踏足在"天底"號的甲板上－尤其是夜裡，當船上安排的娛樂項目和溫馨的節目扮隨著歡聲笑語復歸平靜－我感到一絲絕望。"絕望"這個詞已被人用濫，顯得非常平庸，但是它依舊是一個嚴肅的詞，而我也是在嚴肅的意義上使用這個詞的。於我，它僅僅意味著一種混合情感－一種古怪的求死之念，結合我身上那種狹隘和虛無所帶來的壓迫感，呈現出對死的恐懼。這種感覺和人們所說的"恐懼感"和"焦慮感"很像，但又有著很大的不同。它更像是為逃離無法承受的感覺而只能求死。在這個過程中你會感到自身的渺小、微弱和自私，最終會讓你毫不猶豫地去死。它召喚著你跳下甲板。我估計剛剛說的那些內容會被編輯刪掉，但我還是得交代下說這番話的背景。
• 夜鱼

  2018-07-04
  就好像以为不会让你感到内疚的母亲
• 跳高恐龙

  2017-11-22
  In my case, it meant I knew my limitations and the limitations of what I stood inside, and adjusted thusly. I was at my very best in bad conditions.
• Cal

  2021-07-24
  His pitch is an ironic permission-slip to do what I do best whenever I feel confused and guilty: assume, inside, a sort of fetal position, a pose of passive reception to comfort, escape, reassurance.
• Cal

  2021-07-24
  Hence the mixture of devotion and sneer on so many viewerly faces. Hence also the weird viewer complicity behind TV’s sham “breakthrough programs”: Joe Briefcase needs that PR-patina of “freshness” and “outrageousness” to quiet his conscience while he goes about getting from television what we’ve all been trained to want from it: some strangely American, profoundly shallow, and eternally temporary reassurance.
• Cal

  2021-07-24
  Despite the unquestioned assumption on the part of pop-culture critics that television’s poor old Audience, deep down, “craves novelty,” all available evidence suggests, rather, that the Audience really craves sameness but thinks, deep down, that it ought to crave novelty.
• Ivy

  2020-04-24
  就在这顶红白相间的帐篷底下，人们在真实的草地上，铺上了一大块人造塑料草垫。这也许是我一天里唯一一次受到东海岸式的嘲讽。只需一眼这些假的草垫，就可次以在下面看到真的草，它们已经被人踏平，并渐渐枯萎。我曾有过一种看似古怪、虚假，但却无法动摇的信念，认为周遭的事物全都为我而存在，每当我想起我在中西部地区的童年生活时，这就成了少数几件无法忘怀的事情之一。是否只有我这样的孩子才拥有如此古怪而又无法忘却的情愫？——外在于我的万事万物，只因对我有用才得以存在？别人是否也拥有这般记忆？孩子离开房间后，万物也跟着离开了，一旦他不再从中观望，它就融化成了某种空虚的潜在事物，或者别的什么东西（我个人化的孩童理论）。它被神秘的成人缓慢而沉重地推开，直到孩子再次回到房间里，才能将它召唤出来，重现生机勃勃的样貌。这是否有点疯狂？当然，就这种信念来说，的确有点超出了妄想症，具有强烈的自我中心的味道。再加上此间所包含的责任：如果我每眨一下眼，全世界就会融化和分解，那么假使我就一直闭着眼，情况又会怎样？也许此刻真正让我怀念的事情是，一个孩子激烈而又虚妄的自我中心主义并没有让他感到煎熬或者痛苦。他是伯克利主教眼中的上帝，有着帝王般天真的唯我主义：万物皆空，直到他的目光引领它们前行。他的激励就是世界本身。而这就是为何小孩子会如此恐惧黑暗的原因：并非黑暗中可能有长着獠牙的怪物，而是闭上眼晴之后，万物俱灭，只剩一片虚无。于我，至少可以追随周围人放肆的笑声，这就是我需要夜光的真正原因：它可以让世界继续运转。再者，也许正是世界只为我存在的感觉，使得那些特殊、惯常的公共集会让一个孩子在走出自我意识时感到如此兴奋。假日、游行、暑期旅游、体育比赛、博览会……至此，孩子精神上的兴奋真正成了掌控在自己手中的狂喜：现在不仅为他而存在，并且以特殊的面貌呈现在他面前。拉起的横幅、气球、流动的摊位、小丑的假...
• 雲苍白浅影长

  2019-07-16
  EyMDE�hre�1
• 爸爸

  2017-05-25
  就如同大多数无法承受的悲伤感一样，这种感觉令人难以捉摸。它的起因非常复杂，但结果却异常简单：踏足在”天底“号的甲板上——尤其是夜里，当船上安排的娱乐项目和温馨的节目伴随着欢声笑语复归平静——我感到一丝绝望。“绝望”这个词已经被人用滥，显得非常平庸，但它依旧是一个严肃的词，而我也是在严肃的意义上使用这个词的。于我，它仅仅意味着一种混合情感——一种古怪的求死之念，结合我身上那种狭隘和虚无所带来的压迫感，呈现出对死的恐惧。这种感觉和人们所说的“恐惧”和“焦虑”很像，但又有着很大的不同。它更像是为逃离无法承受的感觉而只能求死。在这个过程中你会感到自身的渺小、微弱和自私，最终会让你毫不犹豫地去死。
• 长堀

  2021-06-10
  林奇把邪恶当成一种力量，这种想法发人深省。人有好有坏，但是这股力量却总是存在。这股力量一一至少是潜在的无处不在。因此邪恶于林奇而言，是移动的，弥漫在各处万物每时每刻皆有其黑暗面一一邪恶并非“暗自潜伏着”“伺机等待着”或者“在地平线上徘徊着，邪恶就在身边。
• 北斗

  2017-08-03
  小说家都是喜欢抛媚眼的人。他们往往会躲藏起来伺机窥探。他们是天生的守望者。他们是观察者他们就如端坐在地铁里的人，冷漠的注视中暗含鬼祟，眼光近乎贪婪。这是因为人类的处境就是作家的猎物。电视存在的全部理由在于，它反映了人们想要看到的事物。它像是浴室里的强光镜，青少年站在它面前审视自己的肱二头肌，把自己的外形打扮的更为光鲜。孤独的人之所以倾向于孤独，更在于他们拒绝承担置身人群所要付出的精神代价。我们这代人从电视上获取的众多欢乐大多源自对它的嘲弄。电视必须用花言巧语允诺带领人们逃离日常生活，如此才能博得人们的眼球。
• 昆汀的影子

  2017-04-12
  我注意到，自1986年以来，午夜和早上6点这个时间段的公交总站里，有超过65%的都市人越来越像林奇电影中的人物——耀眼却无吸引力，软弱无力，怪里怪气，满脸哀怨，与整个环境非常不搭调。
• Mr.Craner

  2017-04-25
  在一篇采访中，华莱士强调，主流的写作“太过熟悉且具有麻醉感”，并且一再提醒读者“重要的是找到各种方式来提醒自己：大多数熟知的事物都是间接与虚妄的”。